Over-50 dating is…well, it’s different from dating when we were younger and met someone in person. IRL, in real life, is the acronym used nowadays.
I’m offering up a few pointers to new daters and the date-weary. Online dating is not for the tender, but then neither is getting older.
1. Never take online dating personally and never give up looking
The point is that if you take online dating personally, you’ll give up too soon before you meet your honey.
Online dating can be fun, but you’ve got to approach it with the right attitude and the energy to see it through.
You’ll need to meet a lot of people, and over-50 daters aren’t always willing to put in the time. Many don’t have the tenacity to hang in there.
If you are meeting new people, which is what online dating is all about, you’ll connect with only a few. You are deciding who is worth your time. Therefore, rejection is a normal part of the dating process.
When you’re rejected, move on. Meet someone else soon, and don’t look back. You’re that much closer to your special person than you were before the rejection.
2. Never bore. Don’t write a boring online profile and don’t write boring emails
You’ve got a profile up to get possible dates to contact you. Put details in there that interest them. Tell them about your trip to Disneyland or your love of thin crust pizza. You want them to email you back and ask a question. Make it easy. Put some meat in your profile, even if you’re a vegetarian.
The same goes with emails. Something a tad provocative (with taste) or a question that requires a full sentence to respond goes a long way. Don’t settle for: I like your profile. Read mine. We might have something in common.
You can do better than that by grabbing something from their profile and asking a question or commenting. Does he like to play tennis? Ask if he’s up for a tennis meet and coffee afterward.
3. Never make a first meet or a date into an interview
Sometimes, senior daters tend to focus too much on inappropriate details. They are in a hurry to begin a relationship and feel that interviewing will speed up the process.
Don’t quiz anyone on their divorce. Don’t quiz them on finances either. You may think you’re being subtle, but it won’t work. Look at each one of your meets as if they’re the best thing since the iPad.
Don’t forget to flirt a little.
4. Never spend more than a few minutes talking about your family
You may disagree, but too many senior daters dwell on their grandchildren on a first meet. I’m talking dwell, as in going on and on about your loved ones. Seriously, you need to establish a connection based on mutual values and passions shared. There’s plenty of time for the joy of family.
Later, when you’re dating.
5. Never talk about your health problems or your impending surgery
For heaven’s sake, that means no talking about that prostate, varicose veins or…you get my point.
Keep it light. Yes, you may have challenges health-wise, and who doesn’t? Save it for later, when you can both share and certainly when you know each other better.
Got any opinions about what NEVER to do when online dating? Tell me in the COMMENTS.